Journey in Place: When Your Place Stops Feeling Safe

Hawk perched deep in the woods

My little city of Athens, Georgia is in a state of shock and mourning today. Yesterday afternoon a young woman was found dead in the woods behind Lake Herrick—my “place”. The story has been reported statewide and even appeared in the New York Times. The death is being considered suspicious, but few details have been released. At this point the police have not identified a suspect. I don’t know for certain, but from the aerial photos I’ve seen on the news, it appears that she died very near the trail that I have been claiming as my own for this year of exploring place— “Tranquility Trail”. My heart aches for the young woman and her family and friends. Together we mourn for this person whose young life was senselessly cut short. And the community mourns our loss of innocence. We have lost our sense of safety in nature. What before was considered a quiet place to exercise, walk your dog, bird watch, explore nature, and gain peace of mind has changed in  character forever because now it is the scene of a terrible act of violence. The area is currently closed to the public while the police continue to investigate. Lake Herrick will open again, and I will go back, but I doubt that I will go there alone for a long time, if ever. And even if they catch the person who did this, my confidence has been shattered. Maybe the space never really was safe. Maybe it was always an assault waiting to happen. But for years, I, and others, walked the trails with no fear. All during the pandemic I walked alone, almost every day. For years I have woken up early to count birds by myself in the quiet morning hours for the Christmas Bird Count. I have visited at dusk to watch fireflies and search for owls. Just last week I followed a hawk off of a main trail and into the woods, and watched it sit on a branch for half an hour or more, far away from any other people. I love those times of silence, contemplation and freedom. I won’t be doing that any more. From now on there will always be that voice telling me to be suspicious and not to dare to venture too far into the quiet trees, and that I should not be alone. Now I will not have the freedom to enjoy the solitude. Now I am angry at what this violent act has stolen from this young woman and from us all. As I listen to the constant drone of helicopters circling as they wait for breaking news I feel a tremendous sense of sadness and weariness. I feel like I have lost my place because I’m not sure I can experience it the same way ever again. I am in mourning.